When Don Juan Met San Juan

from The Don of a New Error by The Alternative Facts

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Don Juan interrupts his golf game long enough to berate the mayor of San Juan, eventually hops on a plane to visit the beleagured island, throws paper towels to the natives, and returns home after a job well done.

As of this writing (11/7), half of the island is still without power. The vast majority of Puerto Ricans have been without power for the past six weeks, and as of this writing (11/7), more than half the island remains without power (and will likely remain that way for another 2-3 months).


Maria's gaining force
Don Juan is on the golf course
The island's getting hit
Don Juan don't give a shit

He hasn't said a word
As if he hasn't even heard
The mayor's desperate pleas
Don Juan says "on your knees!"

From San Juan to Don Juan
"What is taking so long?"
Said San Juan to Don Juan
Soon the island will be gone
Said Don Juan to San Juan
"Why must you babble on?"
Said Don Juan to San Juan
"Island life goes on"

At last he makes the trip
He grabs the mic and let it rip
He says that all is well
The budget's shot to hell
He looks around and scowls
Then tosses out the paper towels
"At last the coast is clear...
I'm getting outta here"

It's Don Juan in San Juan
Looking like a moron
When Don Juan left San Juan
They're glad to see him gone

The island lies in shreds
There's sewage in the watersheds
The infrastructure's gone
And so is old Don Juan
The island is a mess
Don Juan insists he did his best
No way to carry on
No thanks to old Don Juan

He rates himself ten out of ten
And blames the mayor once again
The people start to die
Don Juan just says bye bye


from The Don of a New Error, released February 18, 2019
Written, performed, and recorded by The Alternative Facts
Drums by JD
Copyright © 2019 The Alternative Facts


all rights reserved



The Alternative Facts

Music inspired by the news of the day.

"When injustice becomes law, resistance becomes duty" -- Thomas Jefferson

The Alternative Facts roared to life on Inauguration Day 2017, taking our name from Kellyanne Conway's definition of LIES, which continue to stream from the Trump Administration on a daily basis.

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